notebook

Sometimes I say things like, "In our time, so and so used to happen." It's a sign of how fast our country is progressing, I guess.

But recenty, I was deeply humbled by an old man (50's, not that old, but he says he is, so...). I happened to say the fateful line in his presence one day, and he tells me, "Your time was two days ago! Dont use that phrase, its for people like us."

So I am not going to use the phrase. But when I was in school, and people didn't use too many computers, when we used books and pens a lot more, I used to carry this notebook.

I haven't thought of the notebook for a while now, I don't even remember where it is, though I am pretty sure I didnt throw it out.

I should call it a diary, though it wasn't a conventional one. It had revenge plans, sketches, secrets, and everything that popped into my head.

I have been writing for the past one year,I mean making my living writing, something that I didn't think I would ever do.

I used to tell people I would become a writer when I grew up, as a kid. But then I forgot about it, I decided that life was meant to be practical, and I would never make a living writing. Journalism was always at the back of my mind, but people told me there wasn't much 'scope' in Bhutan. There wasn't, then, I guess. They said I should do something else, and write in my free time. Make it a hobby. And I thought that was a practical thing to do.

But now, here I am, writing, my first real job. I think I never really forgot that dream.

I remembered the notebook while thinking about how I got into my job. Words always seem to have some kind of strange magic on them, when they are strung together in a certain way, they can change people's outlook in life, or in the least, they can bring tears to your eyes, or make you laugh.

Your own words have a certain magic too. They help you think better. I believe that putting your thoughts into black and white actually make you into a better person. In a way, I have stopped writing the way I used to in my notebook, now, I realise. I write stories about people, I write about meetings, about policies, about things that I hear other people say, about things that other people do. It doesn't really come from me. That is how a reporter is supposed to be, I think. Not let any part of me colour what I write. Sometimes, I can't help it, but mostly, I think I stick to that.

Writing on this blog is a lot like the notebook, but I hardly get time to write here so often, as often as thoughts run through my head, at least. Every article I have written on this blog represents who I am, it is my voice out in the world, a little piece of me. Writing down these thoughts reinforce my beleifs, they tell me why I think what I think. I think I need a little more of that.

So I found this pretty little notebook for myself again. Its easier to just pull it out and scribble whatever is running through my head. :)